Now this is really not a shocking story to add to the “Things for all the Time” cannon.
But when I was a kid in the bustling neon world of the 1980s I was totally enthralled with Elvira.
Like, I wanted to be her when I grew up. The thought of having huge hair, fun make-up, that poodle with a mohawk, was one of the most thrilling possibilities I could come up with.
And plus she gets to make fun of herself for a living, and watch awesome movies.
For a mere $40 Halloween Town wants to help make my Mistress of the Dark realities a real thing.
And not just for Halloween:
Just imagine sitting behind me in a movie theater with that hair.
♫Lauren
While you are all dressed up as a kinky cheerleader, or a sexy cookie monster… remember there is someone out there more provocative than you will ever be without trying… And she loves to shake it for Halloween:
My best suggestion is if she’s in the costume contest I wouldn’t make a bet that you could win against her…There is no one else in the world who could wear pumpkins like that.
The bounty of kitschy fabulous things at Halloween Town made the whole world a happy place. One of the joyous pieces I purchased at this establishment was one of the most adorable fascinators I have seen as of late.
I realized if I didn’t have it my life would be complete, and more so I would probably never be invited to a werewolf bar mitzvah. And I don’t want to be a part of that kind of world.
I will wear it even to wash dishes, I am committed to this hat.
♫Lauren
Recently on a trip to the best place on earth… “Halloween Town” in Burbank, Christine and I found a never-ending cavalcade of things we need in everyday life.
Really. I don’t know if that makes me and Christine a little macabre, but that is the way we like it. And in which other way can we lure Tim Burton and Johnny Depp into our houses?
Anyone who knows me, knows that I’m cuckoo for cocoa puffs about the 1960s.
I love the clothes, I love the style. I love modernism, I love the matte lipstick, I love it all.
And I love interpretations of it. So I watch Mad Men, American Dreams, Gilligan’s Island, Petticoat Junction, That Girl, Mary Tyler Moore and every Doris Day movie, as much as possible… and now I watch Pan Am.
It isn’t as smokily correct as many people would like it to be but, eh. As long as I don’t have to see CBS-style-comedy (balls… stds, Haha) I’m basically going to enjoy it.
I'm going to go to the corner and die... because of the historical smoke accuracy
The only part of the show that I don’t really “get” is the main character Laura. Because she may actually be a kitty, playing a person.
I don't get it
But, I do like the show, don’t get me wrong. I realize that sometimes I am not sharpest light in the socket. And seriously I like their clothes. Their clothes are like wow.
Colette has the best clothes.I will definitely wear all of this
Also I like Ted, but that is a surprise to no one is surprised by this as I always like the mildly jerky guy with dark hair and candy: How can I resist?
and here is a doodle to prove it:
But then again maybe I shouldn’t advertise this as men do follow me around trying to get me to pay attention to their card tricks which makes me… so very weirded out.
The blonde guy is nice too, but he may or may not actually be a Ken doll:
He may be like the "Small Wonder" of Air Line Pilots
He’s so blonde and pretty. I feel like he would match any pair of shoes.
Okay and maybe the conclusion of this blog is… I think the pilot’s on this show are handsome dudes. Or maybe that modern guys should dress nicer.
And maybe this year because this show is on the air, I can finally get my hands on one of these:
And I won’t keep having to tell people how much I want one!
♫Lauren
Sometimes the people I know say the best things. I was there at the moment where Amber was describing her friend’s boyfriend, or a guy we work with, or a stranger, or a the cousin of the Brawny guy, or someone who works at Target… and it went a little something like this:
I couldn’t describe it better myself. Thanks Amber!!!
♫Lauren
Some people are very lucky to work in pristine, if not just slightly too Dijon colored offices. Others spend their days in an office that has the delicious smell of food mixtures, and then there is Jimmy:
Jimmy works in dirt. Dirt that is located in sunny destination hotspot, Pacoima. The next time you are there give him a wave. He’ll be the tall skinny one reciting lines from Carrie… he’s hard to miss.
In this post Kardashian world we live in, sometimes a girl like me has problems using search engines and apparently now youtube. I innocently typed in “the smiths” and pressed enter instead of getting this:
I got this:
Seriously internet?
And the next time I google “Paintings of Ponies” am I going to get Kim and her sisters? Come on you know they look a little Horsey Sauce.
Sometimes I have incredible yet very credible rage. I usually doodle it out because no one likes a pissy Lauren (especially The Dab, I think this is his #7 fear.) And, also sometimes I wish Reginald Stabby was real so he could deal with my problems:
Be careful I hear he has some cutting words for you.
Viciously Sweet 