humor

Target Audience

| Viciously Sweet

Do you ever wonder who some products are made for…I mean there is some weird ass stuff out there.

I always wonder am I their audience? Should I buy that portable rotisserie???

Well Let me pitch you an idea of my own:

Have you ever been in a situation where you have grown tired of the look of eggs?

Have you ever said well I eat 5 dozen eggs a day and I am so tired of their boring oval-y shape?

Well Complain no more…

Now you can square your eggs! With the EGG CUBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now our intended audience can have square eggs!

Who is our inteded audience you may ask?

The Little Mer-Cat

| Viciously Sweet

Sometimes I find my cat staring out the window in a manner reminiscent to that of a young Ariel wishing she were part of the human world.

Also, I have a way over active imagination.

That is how I came up with this conclusion:

 

♫Lauren

Stories about Elliott

| Viciously Sweet

I have a cat his name is Elliott.

Elliott likes to do many things, like eating, breaking my mother’s possessions and sleeping.

Here likes to sleep on towels, my head, my pillow, the window sill, his kitty scratchy tube, any person he can sit on, and….

♫Lauren

Safari Time with Christine

| Viciously Sweet

Many moons ago Christine desired to travel the world with her sign languaged enabled chimp friend “Mr. Yoyo”

She thought it would be just like The Jungle Book, but then discovered that it was nothing really like that at all.

And that in real jungles there are real volcanos. 

So she instead sold Mr Yoyo and watched “Arrested Development.”

THE END.

♫Lauren

Waxy Buildup

| Viciously Sweet

Yesterday, Madame Tussaud’s exhibited their latest wax figure, of non celebrity Kim Kardashian.

I think this means that Madam Tussaud’s has officially ran out of people to make into wax statues of. Because this was totally unneccessary.

My sister and I have compiled a list of more deserving “celebrities” to make that waxy leap:

1. Television starlet and media mogul, Judge Judy:

2. Steve Buscemi, we prefer his look from the wedding singer:

3. Brother of Charlie Sheen and mighty duck aficionado Emilio Estevez:

4. Reality TV darling Flavor Flav, hopefully in this pose:

5. The Jackson 5’s cuddly and adorable Marlon Jackson, in a member’s only jacket:

6. Superfreaky Rick James (but not the mary jane girls)

7. Wouldn’t you love to grab your price scanner and get a photo with Flo from Progressive?

8. The whitest and nerdiest Weird Al:

9. How about the Stay Puft Marshmallow man from Ghostbusters?

10. And finally the scandalous and sexiest boat captain alive… the Gorton’s fisherman:

 

♫Lauren

Baby Names for Mimi

| Viciously Sweet

I bring to you the newest game between my sister and I naming Mariah Carey’s impending baby.

There has been many laughs tears and a forceful debate about the names and so I bring you the best of the best.

Here are my possible names for Mariah Carey’s baby:

1. Glitter Butterfly

2. Heaven Angelpie

3. Hello Kitty

4. Baby Baby

5. Shimmer

6. Glitter Mc Glitter

7. Angel Glitterkiss

8. Maria Carey 2

9. Fuzzy Kitten

10. Little Mi

11.  Sunshine Kisses

12. Pony

13. Golden Sparkle

14. Princess Mariah

15. Snuggie

Happy Baby Time. And my bet is Shimmer, so I hope it is not a boy.

♫Lauren & Christie

I ♥ Community

| Viciously Sweet

It’s a really funny show. A show that I like to watch.

Starring Joel Mc Hale, of “the Soup” Fame:

Here is a clip of him playing strip billards with Shawn’s Dad from Boy Meets World.

Also on a similar note I took a personality test based off the characters and got Annie. Which is really not all together suprising. She is kind of like a young (still sweatered) Emma from “glee”.

Get your Professor Chang on and find out which character you’re most like…

http://www.buddytv.com/personalityquiz/community-personalityquiz.aspx?quiz=100000040

♫Lauren

The Phantom Kitty

| Viciously Sweet

I was talking to my sister in law and we came up with this lovable friend. Phantom Kitty!
I being an avid doodler had to draw him… I present to you, Phantom Kitty:

A few things you should know about him:
His Favorite Band is Phantom Planet.
His Favorite drink is Orange Fanta.
His Favorite movie is “The Phantasm”

How great are my puns? Phan-tastic.

♫Lauren