The Tragic Kingdom

i feel like some Gwen Stefani right now without spectacular abs…

My life has been like super crazy hectic lately.

I don’t know when it happened… But my boring drawing-in-my-pajamas-lifestyle is disappearing.

And it’s being replaced by the life of someone who to keep dates straight… has a calendar.

A CALENDAR for crying out loud!

I now have to know when dates of the week are… and well that has never been one of my strong points. And then I have to remind myself to not doodle over days on said calendar.

And for a first time calendar user. I can tell you I’m not super into it. It’s severely cramping my lifestyle. I’ve always relied on being an “artist” and just wafting all about… like one day I’m here next day I’m some place else. Following my proverbial sun to wherever I need to go….

Will I call you back? Will you see me before the seasons change? The world may never know.

And now there are schedules, and deadlines. And for some reason… I just seem to keep failing at all of them.

Meet you here at this time? I’m either super early, or nope… I forgot this and now we have to reschedule…

And now I’m stressed out. And the only way I can de-stress is to make light of my last week of failures.

and now without fail….

Lauren’s week of Blunders:

– Losing my pants… where did they go? I have no idea. But the weather is changing and I don’t want to wear tights under my dresses everyday. This is not practical. I’m about to put out a flyer looking for them.

– Forgetting how calendars work… why are we arguing about days of the week??? Because I was looking in the wrong month. Yeah, I am not used to calendars.

– Falling to the earth for no apparent reason while standing and talking to my mother. She probably thinks I was drunk. Every time I do something strange she assumes both alcohol & drugs.

– The always dangerous, the dress you are wearing is see through… And now everyone has seen your superman underpants. Why do dresses not seem sheer when you are trying them on? Why do superman underpants show through everything?

-Everything I have done at work… I mean EVERYTHING! Any time I try to do things the right way… and I end up crying… and my boss has not been super nice to me lately either. I have contemplated becoming a gypsy and a hot dog attendant at weinerschnitzel several times in the last week. Or a combination of the two “Gypsyschnitzel” has a great appeal to it. I imagine a lot of tambourines and sauerkraut.

– I also can’t find my sneakers and think there is conspiracy happening… where did one pants and one shoe go to? I’m thinking Jack White stole them…. and I can’t explain why.

-And everything pertaining to relationships (part of my need for a calendar) Apparently people get upset when you tell them… you have no time for them.

I’m done with my blunders… Okay this all seems kinda negative.

So onto some positive things

– I have been doodling more lately… which is better than all the nothing I was drawing last month.

-New TV is on and by that I mean… “The Mindy Project” & “Parks & Recreation”. I seem to watch nothing else.

-My internet adds are all for new shoes and yeti merchandise.

-I’m getting pizza in a few minutes and I feel like this:

image via: this very tumblr

Peace & Pizza & better days ahead.


Checkerboard chick

Do you like No Doubt?

Do you have lots of money to spare on an outfit that will probably never ever fit you?

Well then I have found what you are looking for!

No Doubt is auctioning off clothes and instruments from last years, wickedly awesome tour.

Including this:

The money goes to a really great cause, the Children’s Hopsital of Orange County. The auction is June 1st to June 11th all up on the Ebay.

And if you buy it, make sure that you ain’t no holla back girl.


Stand & Deliver

No not that Edward James Olmos movie.

I am so addicted to the new No Doubt song “Stand and Deliver”.

it’s a slightly more rasta version than that of Atom Ants. It’s guaranteed tons of fun…

it also makes me think that No Doubt should sell Pizza… because it would make an awesome Pizza Hut song…

seriously, your money or your life
seriously, your money or your life


And they could have like a No Doubt Pizza flavor and stuff… I have no clue what kind of toppings that would include… maybe pineapple :)

Stand & Deliver by No Doubt