The boring-est boredom that has ever been bored

September 10, 2012September 10, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

Today I have not much to post or any desire to color… because work is really boring. Here is an artist interpretation of my boredom:

And then I got really excited that I get to go to the doctor’s office. This has never happened before as I really don’t like going to the doctor… like it’s at the bottom of my fun list… but today it’s like a blessing from the Lord of Healthcare. Go bad back!

And also go work! I think they like to make sure all my dreams are dead by Wednesday, so they are really ahead this week.

♫Lauren

It’s not me… It’s you…

September 5, 2012September 5, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

This post for many reasons must be short and sweet. There are some people in your life that are incredible blessings, and there are some people that aren’t. And we don’t always see that people are bad influences on us until something major happens. And then sometimes you still try to be blind to it… for one reason or another… and then you find yourself buying handfuls of lip-glosses in shades you aren’t even sure you want to wear… Oh, wait that’s just me.

Speaking of me I did something I’ve needed to do for months, took a break. And my eyes were opened. I saw miles of consignment shops, and deserts, and some of the most fabulous people you could ever meet… and then I realized the best thing ever:

And I deserve to be happy whenever I please.

♫Lauren

My So Called (Unicorn) Life

August 30, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

Earlier this year I adopted a life motto I couldn’t have said better myself:

“No one looks stupid when they are having fun.”-Amy Poehler.

And since then I have really embraced it, I accept all offers if they sound like fun. Sometimes even if they don’t… and I know I can make them fun. And since then I have realized a few things.. the most important is, I live a fabulous and rare existence.

I really do.

I love to dance all over my house to Aretha Franklin songs. Drive to work singing along with Pitbull, drive home singing the songs of Phil Collins. And I draw for hours, sometimes I get paid for it… And then I also doodle in addition to that, just for fun. I can and do decided to go on super fabulous adventures on the drop of a hat… but not to Sea World on a Saturday (you can’t win them all.) I have a closet full of fabulous threads. Tons of lip-glosses and nail polishes… scads of jewelry and shoes. I also just got a pair of sparkly tights in the mail… I really do live a charmed life. And best of all is I have some fabulous friends who let me exist in my sparkly universe, and stop on by on occasion to watch it in real time. And my friends are all so different and deliciously brilliant, I get the thrill to appreciate each wonderful thing about them!

Now about a month ago if anyone had mentioned the fact that I live a rare magical existence I would have burst into tears, because I desperately wanted to be grounded like everyone else I know*. But lately I realized through a few fantastic people… that I make their days a little brighter. And that really changed everything. I thank you friends for making me feel like the most magical unicorn that has ever existed. I may care more about concerts and charities than business and finances and I don’t know stock options and refinancing… or whatever serious people are into… but I do know that sometimes there is nothing better than watching a Disney cartoon and eating pizza after a hard day.

The world doesn’t have to be such a serious place, it can be full of the joy we make. And I think that is a choice that we make… I choose the fun, even if I look stupid.

Thank you friends for letting me be your unicorn.

♫Lauren

Confessions Pt. II now with Giggles

August 20, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

I am a very bubbly happy person. You know the sort, the eternal optimist that thinks everyone and everything is just fantastic…

Basically everyday I wake up and float to work on a cloud. And then I chit chat a bit at the office, and carry on with my giggly day. Drawing, laughing, keeping secret wishes of joy that I keep to myself.

And then things happen. People all my life have called me “trouble,” and I have never willingly gone out to look for it. I don’t walk around dressed like a “Thunderbird,” I don’t ask the warriors to come out to play, and I rarely Ferris Bueller style my days. However it still lingers, I guess I attract weird things/events/people. And this is not limited to jovial Rastafarian’s telling me to carry on with my bad self in the streets, children thinking I am a Disney princess, or even Enrique Iglesias getting a little too up close and personal with yours truly (up coming post, seriously.)

Well anyways, today one of those kinds of things happened and I hope I don’t get my very good friend in trouble because of my girly ways. And honestly it was all just an innocent event, we just went out to lunch… but we didn’t expect to run into people he knows. Our lunch was a lunch of friendship… but it felt so embarrassing. You know… the grown up shame of being friends with a person of the opposite gender. Now this is not especially bad until you involve me, the giggliest person ever, who was wearing a rather comfy but a little snug tank top and breezy summer skirt… with my hair actually done and my makeup as nice as I could do. In the world of 13 going on 30 I really knocked it out of the ballpark today! However, in the world of eating with a guy friend at lunch… I made a HUGE mistake. We have both never eaten lunch so quickly and while simultaneously the color of a raspberry.

And then I realized it all these strange events in my life happen because of me! And all my friends and I have events that we don’t want to share with other people. I feel like there is something wrong with that… does everyone have secrets like this? Do I just make average events so much worse with my awkwardness? Does anyone want to sing an Usher song about this with me?

Here’s to a less eventful evening…
♫Lauren

Work Confessions: The Hive

August 6, 2012August 6, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

Today’s post is short and sweet (just like me!)

I go to the bathroom a lot at work. Sometimes it’s because I drink too much water, other times it’s to calm myself from being stressed, sometimes it’s because I have to cry in a private situation… and sometimes:

I can’t be the only person in their mid-twenties thinking about beehives during work hours. Think about how big you could make it… maybe it could hold office supplies… or a switchblade like that girl from La Bamba.

I was briefly worried this doodle would make me sound weird, but we all need a little work relief sometimes… and I know someone who has eaten lunch in the bathroom to escape their office.

♫Lauren

A Lack of Inspiration

July 24, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

I work in a very interesting office.
The people I work with would make great characters if anyone decided to write about them. (Which I sometimes do!) We all seem to be complex creatures, and more than a little out there. But lately, there has been a lot more work and a lot less fun…

Yeah, yeah I have more project responsibility, but quite frankly I’m not an architectural Spiderman.

And then to make it worse, everything has been so quiet in here that I feel my office mates may have been replaced with scarecrow versions of themselves. Just propped up to the computer with an occasional mouse clicking sound being emitted from them.

I cannot exist happily in an environment like this… it makes me very sad and makes me lack any sort of inspiration. Which is a total bummer when you are making spaces for people to work in, I feel like they suffer secondhand depression spaces to work in because, of this lackluster environment I am stuck in. And then I looked around my actual office and realized the actual windowless cubicle I work in is not helping my office depression either, I hardly ever see outside during actual sunny hours. I remember it being very lovely:

Now I’m not completely dissing my office. It is in a great location… once you get outside. And by that I mean, it’s next to a bar. And my boss is wonderful and I work with a couple of really great people. But really, the walls that block the vision from the windows seems like a cruel joke. The fact I am the only person that doesn’t have a window… is a crueler joke. Why did the person who drew up this building hate people so much, why not make sitelines so I can see the beautiful mountains just outside the building? Why did you set the lobby on the most blinding side of the building? Why has no one ever replaced the pink marble tiles that have cracks big enough to get your heels stuck in? Why is everything outside of our rented space mauve and brown?

It’s not like I need the circus at work.. I just need a little more joy.

♫Lauren

The Cat Olympics

July 18, 2012July 18, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

I think sometimes my cats are trying to get to the Olympics, and as cat owners know there are very few categories cats can participate in. The few tests of endurance made for felines are obviously: sleeping, eating, barfing grass, and pooping.

While Elliott has the silver medal in sleeping on my bed… I’m more concerned about the dreams of my little gray cat Rocket…

My Rocket and Me! — Here we are while he’s working on his digestion

Rocket goes to the bathroom with the sheer power of Thor. I’m really concerned how if I feed the pets the same amount of food how he can make so much poo. He is like the Carl Lewis of pooping animals. Sometimes I swear he goes to buffets while I’m at work all day… just to make sure that litter box is full by the time I get home…

So I drew a doodle about it, and because I’m more than a little weird I keyed it into the sweet 1985 musical hit by Eddie Murphy:

He potty’s all the time!

♫Lauren

Provocative Greetings

July 16, 2012 | Viciously Sweet

I have a world of knowledge I need to talk about, but it seems so heavy for a Monday. And much like a plate of steamy meatloaf with a bowl of soup on a really hot summer day… I’m going to choose to have a barbecue chicken and chilly lemonade kind of post instead.
Today I will share a doodle crossover sensation… which is both doodle Lauren and her favorite cactus… Provocative Cactus.

I just realized that we are quite into summer already and there has been nary a provocative cactus post…And having a summer season without a Provocative Cactus is practically illegal in California.

Without further ado I give you the doodle of the summer:

That cactus really has it going on. And I apologize to the children… because just like real life there is about 80% more boob in this picture than what people can usually handle… there is really just no place to hide it.

Tomorrow I may plague the internet with my burdens… but, then again maybe we should just enjoy some cotton candy.

♫Lauren