I am a clumsy person. Just ask anyone who has ever met me in real life. I fall while walking, drop everything on myself (today a bucket of rubber bands)… and once almost poked out my eye with an x-acto blade because I had an itch in my hair and forgot I was holding it the sharpest of all blades.
Today I was quite happy to wear this really cute retro style polka dot dress (polka dots are my thing!) And in my I’m a hot mess lifestyle, I actually thought I was looking rather dorky chic. I went to the bathroom adjusted the top, and then it happened I realized that my full circle dress, perfect for spinning around in was actually stuck in my underpants. IN THE UNDERPANTS!
This has never happened before, and what can only make it better is that my coworker caught me correcting the problem. I felt like saying “Happy Monday everyone, my underpants are pink hearts today!” But instead I turned red, and sat as low in my seat as possible.
I caught my dress being stuck the next 2 times it happened in the remaining 4 hours of the day…. before I showed my coworkers my underpants. Tomorrow I wear pants with pants on top of that.
Have you ever met someone who makes your head wobble like a bobble head?
A person who would rather not get what they want because the have something already they are just to lazy to give up? A person who has no sense of adventure or desire to go out in the world and do what they really need to do to make themselves happy? A person that you constantly root for only to have them eternally disappoint you? A person who chooses to live “a life of quiet desperation” like an anecdote of Thoreau? A person who you have no reason to have an affinity for besides the fact that your gut tells you, you should? I have one of those people in my life, and sometimes they read this blog. I must say I find this person fascinating in all the ways they are not anything like me. And I like the way that this person uses logic to always make himself feel like he is doing whats best, but he’s really not living on anything more than a sense of duty. But what I don’t like, is that all time they make me sad.
You may be saying, those are some pretty heavy words for a gal like Lauren. And, I know that I am far from perfect. I laugh a little too much, have self deprecating humor, a head constantly stuck in the clouds, I believe in people and general goodness a little too much, and I am currently drawing a rooster at my desk as we speak. I am a weirdo, I am socially awkward. I wear dresses that never ever hide my cleavage, because I ran out of caring for the constant staring at my person. But I would like to think that try to be a good person. And that I have things in my life that I love and that I choose to have in my life because they make me happy, and I have weeded out things that just don’t. And yes I have made risky moves… like getting nearly kicked out of the program in college for challenging a teacher who was terrorizing non-white students, that time I wore a dress with polka dot underpants to work to find out at about 3pm that my dress was see through. Recently hiking against my doctors wishes… And more seriously ending a relationship of nearly 5 years because we were not suited to go through the rest of our lives together as a couple. And yes it sucked, and it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done… but I think I’m better for it (and p.s. I have never worn that dress again with polka dot underwear.)
And life changes everyday, because WE CHANGE EVERYDAY. And that is important, because we are not Garfield comic strips (Urg. Mondays!). And some times we can get everything we want, especially and most easily when it’s presented to you. And sometimes we have to settle for not exactly the thing we need, but we get by. It’s important to know when to take the risk, and when to go for the gold. Frankly I’m 26 years old and I still go for the gold because I think life is too short to not be the happiest that we can. And I make mistakes, LOTS of them… but I learn from them. I would hate to be old and haunted by never getting what I wanted… because I never tried.
And now after all that mire of text you just got through. I present to you life lesson #2 presented by Amber:
Take my frequent buyers card, and now you can never ever get pizza.
Sometimes its as easy as buying a pizza, sometimes it’s as complicated as admitting you want to do something different with your entire life.
Today at lady lunch (a lunch consisting of just Amber and me) I was talking to the waitress. And let’s just be honest, she’s our favorite in the history of ladies who bring us food. So I was telling her it’s been such a long work week. She told me “It’s only Tuesday.” And I responded “still being haunted from last week.”
And boy am I.
I pulled a little tiny harmless baby prank last week, and it did not go over well. I have a certain coworker who is now mad at me because he may have been made the background of our office laptop with a slogan about his *ahem* professionalism, and it may have even been this picture (which makes a stunning background, btw)… and fancy people may have seen it, even though he was supposed to be using it to measure a building… and not showing the computer about to people. *throat clearing sound* I mean was that really that bad? I would have joked the embarrassment away personally… *mmm hmmm*
Well, there isn’t a super lot I can do about that right now… but I can segue into a better subject with the help of my good friend the ellipsis…
…The weather is changing like crazy here, which is also something I have no control over. In California the fall can be incredibly hot, and then incredibly cold. Today is a mildly warm day and because I have been cramped in a cubicle for so long… I have a dream to get home, turn on the sprinklers… and then run like hell through those sprinklers:
And while I dash through that sprinkler I will listen to this song, and not melt the night away:
There is no doodle today because I have been working like a mouse making a Cinderella’s dress!
I am still at work and my brain hurts a bit. I have to take PDF’s and make them into a power point. When I asked if I could just make a multiple page PDF. I was told the person did not comprehend it…
So I’m being the Cher of technology and turning back time on it’s butt. Hey there power point!
Next Goal take away all the Xbox 360s with Call of Duty and replace them with DOS computers with the Oregon Trail!
UPDATE: Everyone in my Target audience was amazed with my hysterical story!
I’m still a little quiet today, but I feel more in a giggly place.
I am thinking of attributing it to the following:
♥ I am wearing my favorite skirt… a leopard pencil skirt to be exact
♥ I ate some delicious chicken for lunch
♥ I have been drawing wedding sheep, I was asked to make a few drawings for an upcoming wedding! It makes me feel like I’m coming up in the world with my drawings
♥ I saw “Bachelorette” the movie with Amber last night… and I loved it. I loved it so much that I want to do the robot while listening to the Proclaimers…. all. day. long.
♥ Cakes McCain of Pasta for One, sent me a bleak/cheery? song today that reminded me that my future is bright so bright I have to wear shades… so I strapped on a pair:
This is actually a lie, because this photo was not from today… and I cropped people out of it :) But I’m wearing shades for my bright future!
But today several of my jollies came from the fact my co-worker… the Exceptional Dab keeps mentioning that my typing sounds like I’m killing my computer. Or as he calls it “an angry typer”. Sadly, when I listened to myself type I had to agree with him… But I don’t always type this way because I’m sending people angry emails sometimes I just get so excited about words!. So this brought me to a doodle-y conclusion:
For the rest of the day I’m going to talk like Rosalind Russell from “His girl Friday”… I’m a hundred miles a minute, and witty to boot.
Soooo ya see, I’m gonna break this computer. And when I do, I’ll call that knucklehead professional IT guy to make all it’s problems go away. (And I said that it 2 seconds.)
I’m blaming the weather for my strange condition. I am in a fünke funky mood. Today was much nicer at work, maybe because I caught up on a lot of things… maybe because I pulled a prank on Eric he hasn’t found out yet. I had a lovely lunch that was mostly bacon. But still I find myself as lethargic as humanly possible. On that note I bring to you my doodle brain child of the day:
Today I have not much to post or any desire to color… because work is really boring. Here is an artist interpretation of my boredom:
And then I got really excited that I get to go to the doctor’s office. This has never happened before as I really don’t like going to the doctor… like it’s at the bottom of my fun list… but today it’s like a blessing from the Lord of Healthcare. Go bad back!
And also go work! I think they like to make sure all my dreams are dead by Wednesday, so they are really ahead this week.
This post for many reasons must be short and sweet. There are some people in your life that are incredible blessings, and there are some people that aren’t. And we don’t always see that people are bad influences on us until something major happens. And then sometimes you still try to be blind to it… for one reason or another… and then you find yourself buying handfuls of lip-glosses in shades you aren’t even sure you want to wear… Oh, wait that’s just me.
Speaking of me I did something I’ve needed to do for months, took a break. And my eyes were opened. I saw miles of consignment shops, and deserts, and some of the most fabulous people you could ever meet… and then I realized the best thing ever:
Viciously Sweet 
