I made this last year and I apparently forgot to post it.
I made this during a time when all I was doing felt wrong. And I can tell you it came from frustration and me thinking that I was failing at everything.
Now I am not. I know I am not, and I cannot tell you in words how great it feels.
I am now surrounded by books containing knowledge, and people who are happy to see me. It feels lovely. I rarely think about how I felt at the time I drew this doodle now.
I was anxious. I was nervous. I was wishing to be somewhere else.
Is this all too deep for a Friday?
I hope that everyone can keep it together this weekend… but never forget that there are always paper clips there to help. They could be literal paperclips, binders, staples and what nots… or they could be friends, family, or even Mindy Kaling’s tv show.
I hope that if you need them you find paperclips of your own.
♥Lauren
P.S I have been reading the history of Uppity Women by Vicki Leon and the works of James Thurber. Both are fantastic.
I was debating on posting this… so I just bit the bullet and posted it anyways.
It isn’t any secret… I’m in my second week of being jobless.
Starting 2014 with nothing to do in the hours that I usually have filled with drawing weird details and drawings of fireplaces is kinda strange. Did you know that there is sunshine during those hours? Did you know that you can help and visit with a lot of people during these hours? Did you know you can exercise during those hours? And climb rocks and figure out what exactly you can be? Being jobless for the first time since I was 17 is surreal to say the least, and I have of course been focused on finding it’s silver lining.
Honest to goodness I can say that I think watching “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty” two days before I was unemployed was exactly what I needed to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. Now I’m not suggesting this is a movie for everyone to see, because I’m known to oversell things I like. And, I don’t know many people personally who can benefit from it’s message, unless they are willing to reflect on their own experiences with honesty and candor… But, I can say that for me, this movie was life changing. I haven’t found a person in actual life who could tell me more about what is about to happen in mine. Walter, to me was more than a fictional character who’s has an incredible imagination, and is charmingly awkward. His years of making others thoughts and rough work into beautiful printed completion was never truly appreciated for what it was, but he did it sometimes with glee sometimes with just need to get it done. I’m not saying that is word for word my existence. But I like that Walter was so dedicated to a job that he knew was going to be lost, and who can really appreciate that?
Well, Walter did. And I thank him for it.
Actually… my work isn’t about reviewing movies… So, I need to move on.
I’m not going to focus on any of the past but I will say this with some joy… I no longer have people asking how long my Doctor’s appointments should last– I no longer have anyone guilting me into not getting annual check ups, or counting how many times I have gone to the bathroom. That I will simply not miss.
However working with a team you trust, is kind of amazing, I will never forget it or them. Those people know who they are.
But life moves on.
And then you watch Meg Ryan movies as you fill out job applications. Because she is a kindred spirit, like Drew Barrymore and Tina Fey. And then you notice things in movies you’ve seen a million times but never thought of before:
I think Meg Ryan character’s must be the wisest of all characters :) And I made this on scratch paper with markers I found during “Sleepless in Seattle.”
And this time I thought about it… Why yes I do. FOREVER. It’s natural, it’s infinite and at times it’s terrifying.
But when you have hope and goals maybe it isn’t so bad. I hope to do something brilliant with my forever. And I’m working on it right now.
Today I want to share with you my most versatile present given to me this Christmas.
The pajamas my mother bought me.
You may say… Have you given up on life? How are pajamas the most versatile thing given to a girl who seldom wears pants and is usually coated in jewelry?
Well… Let me tell you. They are roughly 3 sizes larger than I usually wear. And I can comfortably fit 2 cats in them with me…
So basically now I have clothes that I can fit roughly 20 lbs of additional animal, and at least 1 cooler loaded to the brim with Dr. Pepper and protein bars.
While running around the house stuffing assorted pillows, animals, and pottery in there with me I realized they could provide me with a new type of lifestyle:
And we could all live in there in peace and harmony!
I can now camp across America in a very delightful way… the only thing is I need pajamas that are meant to fit on just a person too.
And don’t for one second think that I didn’t want to call friends and make a blanket fort town with this as it’s foundation.
Troy and Abed of Community in possibly the one size larger pajama set. Image coutesy of Community Wiki.
This time of year always has so much stuff to get done. It’s hard to savor a moment.
And then all my spare time lately has been learning highly specific things about architecture. As someday soon I would like to have my license and be able to sign my name to all the drawings of buildings I feel confident and proud to say that I have worked on.
I have been finding a lot of my nights that don’t involve dancing, or shopping for lovely gifts for my family have been me reading about new types of construction, lateral loads, wind forces, and proper ventilation.
And it’s doing funny things to my brain.
It has several times in the last month made my brain feel overloaded.
Like I can tell you about foundation underpinning, but I forgot which way is left.
Or I can explain to you LEED requirements but I can’t remember what a hoagie is.
“I want one of those long sandwiches… with the meaty goodness and the cheese. You know what talking about!!!!”
And the saddest thing of all is I can’t even retain silly television trivia.
My brain has temporarily shut down on all things I find interesting.
And has replaced it with buildings and ceilings, and details of stairs.
And you would think that would mean I’m literally melting off the pounds…
Well no, not exactly. I feel hungrier than a linebacker on their way to the Super Bowl as a side effect.
But that is not what I want to focus on here. This is where I admit I had a soda and a hostess cupcake for lunch, but seriously all the sugar that’s been around me I feel like it is literally in the air whispering my name… and who am I to deny how much sugar wants to be eaten?
I will certainly not be the girl who denies sugar.
Oh wait- – –
I was talking about my attempts of being more active.
I, as you all know, am not athletic.
Like basically any sport you can think of that has coordination as a part of it… is something I simply will not be good at. Just ask all the guys who have tried to teach me to golf, or play basketball. At least they have fun admitting I will never learn, but am a tenacious trier.
One thing I have discovered that I’m not so bad at is… dance. On my quest of exercise I’ve been spending a lot of my non-studying time in the world of belly-dance. It’s an amazing art form. So much hip shaking and sparkles. And when I’m not reading about sustainable this and that’s for the test I have in a month… I’ve been dancing. (This is actually why I’ve had very little doodles to share, sorry about that Internet.)
On Friday there was a performance with some of the girls I dance with. It was so fun and sparkly and beautiful. It was my first belly-dancing event and I even left the show so swathed in the scent of incense that I thought the Pope was going to bless people with me.
I was inspired to actually doodle some business, and rather than focusing on how I smelled like a Palm Sunday mass… I thought of a simple fun doodle:
I wish I was dancing right now!
I wish I was dancing right now and not sitting at work…
It’s that time of year when I have very little desire to be here in general. I think it’s because I know that none of these people like each other*… and that I still have 48 hours of vacation that I haven’t taken this year!
I’m going to remedy that next week by running away.
And on vacation I’m going to dance, doodle and very much not work.
Happy Monday!
♥LAUREN
*I’m still trying to figure out if this is an exaggeration… But at the very least there are office mean girls (and they are not girls)
I know its not exactly mid-week… but bear with me… I finally fit some internetting into my schedule that isn’t about the glorious world of sustainable design and bidding documents…
And then it happened. I was like totally clicking and clacking all over the internet and I found myself totally distracted by sprinkles.
And that’s what brings me to this (kind of) midweek confession:
sprinkity sprinkles
It was like 20 minutes before I realized I need to get back to work….
Also reading this somewhere in the wild north my brother is not surprised that I said any of this.
I turned 28 this weekend! And I dreamed it had many more elephants than it actually did!
I never really think the new year starts when January first comes around.
In fact I’m not really into New Years Resolutions in the typical sense.
I like to start them on my birthday because I feel that is the best time when I can set my goals and just see where I am the next year.
And then New Year’s is much less pressure… And it is just for wearing weird eyeglasses and drinking…. just like the Lord intended!
So let’s recap some of the things.
Things that I learned at 27:
♥ That people from high school forget most things about you in 10 years and have created stories that are practically legends. Someone told me they remember me being banned from several Los Angeles hot spots and also having VIP parties at school. Which is totally untrue because I don’t believe in exclusivity– the parties were never exclusive.
♥Being really cheerful can get people to be really excited to see you. This weekend I went to a store I visit quite often and the workers sang me happy birthday.
♥Friends are really amazing. Thank your friends for being amazing if you read this. My friends were so sweet this weekend, but they are wonderful all the time so *hair flip* nothing is new about that.
♥For fabulous traveling hair wear a wig! I haven’t done it but it’s a great idea (thanks Cakes!):
♥Make sure the parking lot you park your car in is not locked at a certain time at night… and if so pray that the person you are with is a welder.
♥If something seems to good to be true… it probably is.
♥Only you can prevent forest fires make yourself happy. If you are depending on other people for this… you are going to have a bad time.
♥Ben Affleck may be an okay Batman, we should give him a chance.
♥Never write people notes on their car when you have drank too much.
♥Don’t waste your time with people who make you unhappy… instead spend time with the people who make you smile.
♥Always do your best even if you aren’t going to be noticed for it.
♥“Fenestration” means having windows… but it’s a horrid sounding word.
♥Bellydancing is probably the most fun I think I have had in a really long time, and it’s the best way to get rid of the stress of having to learn words like “fenestration.”
♥Also my coworkers think bellydancing is stripping… it is actually super not.
Things I will do next year:
♥I’m going to buy that ukulele in Hawaii this year, and by this time next year I will be serenading people with it!
♥ I am going to take my Licensing tests… I already have a date set. This time it’s happening
♥I’m going to learn how to do my hair… I mean having messy bed hair is in now, but eventually I’m not always going to be able to get away with my charming hippy look. And some events need more than 1940s hot roller hair.
♥I will just keep on keeping on being comfortable with myself. It’s really just an amazing thing to be comfy and not so serious to think you can’t make fun of yourself.
♥I will lessen my gossiping. I heard some people gossiping a few weeks ago like serious, and all I could think is “I’m too old for this.”
♥I’m also going to travel more next year… I haven’t been anywhere in so long I feel actual wanderlust. BTW that means you Washington State ;)
Cheers to 28 and the next 365 days!
And thanks to everyone who comes here to see the doodles, and read my weird words… You are truly:
Jimmy found himself in my neck of the woods during lunchtime. So we partook in business peoples lunch.
We looked so professional… dressed like grown ups who have to go to work at 8 in the am.
I thought about how Jimmy and I used to lunch everyday together when we were in school that was basically 5-6 days a week for a 5 year program.
That is an insane amount of lunches.
One great thing about working is now I can afford to not eat hideous school cafeteria lunches… and neither Jimmy nor I pulled an all nighter the evening before. Basically our lunch today was like tenfold fancier than any lunch we had in school.
Lunching it up with Jimmy.
Oh, I still spilled food down my shirt…. because even as a grown up I’m still a klutz.
Viciously Sweet 