good times

The Isle of Misfit Toys has found it’s Queen

| Viciously Sweet

This time of year is a really fabulous time. You get to see the world be a little cheerier.

But it is also a time of plentiful get together’s, parties, meet and greets… and the ever exclusive couples parties (that I attend in my own special unicorn fashion). These parties make me excited to get to see my friends, and pray that they are wearing a Christmas sweater that is enough to make Bill Cosby enviable. I always do something at these events (like fall into a planter, forget everyone’s name) and this helps me remember that I am an awkward goof.

Now being a goof is really great at certain times…. I can lighten up a family shindig. I can can tell an entertaining tale, I can have my friends in stitches (of laughter, I’m not violent). But not every party is just friends, and some parties are mandatory and full of people who rather don’t like you.

This is when I want to climb into my bedazzled cocoon, because no matter what I do these people will talk down to me. The will say cruel and unnecessary comments about my style, lifestyle, weight, and anything that strikes them at the moment. This is the very thing I dread each year about the holiday season.

But this year is different. This year, I really don’t care.

I would be a heart shaped peg if I was a peg… this is an amazing truth!

And the reason I don’t care is that…. I like me. And if you feel the same way about the holiday season… remember there is only ONE you for a reason (unless you are a multiple) and you being around is an awesome thing. So what if the people you have to spend time with don’t think you are that fantastic… somewhere out there other people do. I know I sound like a Hallmark Card, but if you are reading this you are an AWESOME person. Simply, because you are. So go around this holiday season being yourself around not so nice coworkers, or weird uncles, or mean mothers in line to buy toys for their children. So what if they don’t like you… Just like being yourself!
I’m so awkward!
Be wonderful to everyone, especially if they don’t deserve it.

♥Lauren

Isabel Stare-a-thon 2012: The Flock

| Viciously Sweet

Happy Isabel Stare-a-thon everybody!

I was thinking that the stare-a-thon could use a little more pizzaz. So I dusted the sparkles from my brow and said… “Why not make it a little more musical?”

So today read the following with the sweet beat of the 12 days of Christmas:

On the 8th day of the stare-a-thon I would like to share with thee a Bird staring at Isabel by some trees:

He did 7 hours of staring’

With 6 passing tourists…

5 DAYS IN A ROW!!!!!

With 4 bathroom breaks,

3 parked cars…

2 beatty eyes…

At ONE Isabel holding flowers!

I’m expecting Isabel to be questioning my brain thoughts after reading this. And for everyone who is severely confused by a holiday made to stare at a stranger… I should have a doodle up later today too. And a story, a story about things that can only happen to me.

♥Lauren

The Duality of My Nature

| Viciously Sweet

Now some of you may know I’m kind of a girly girl. Like, a serious matching-jewelry-to-my-sweater-to-my-soul, kind of girl. Like, I skip on clouds made of cotton candy kind of girl. And this by the way is all true, my soul is bright orange and covered in flowers, and my the bottoms of my shoes are sticky.

However, even for a girly girl I have to have time out to just chill. And this is where I bring out on display my two polar opposite senses of style. Let me describe them a little for you.

1. My “I’m so fancy, and sparkly” look. This transcends all of my usual outfits that make me look like a sailor from a 1960s musical or Jenna Rink from “13 going on 30”. When I get fancy… it is ornate. There are fake eyelashes, diamond flaked mascara. There is serious fancy time hair. There are borrowed jewels. Basically you take me out for a fancy night… I’m going to show up looking like we’re going to the Academy Awards. (This is also probably why no one takes me to nice places, but why I’m tops on the bring a date list to company parties. Just in case you are wondering, I can clean up well, and I like appetizers.)

2. My “Liz Lemon having it all” outfits. This is when I’m comfortable, and it usually very shortly follows my “fancy” look. This is when I have no more patience for trying to look nice. This is that moment when your makeup is begging to be washed off. This coincides with the moment I can’t imagine living without my  pajama pants and a tank top. There is also sometimes a sweat shirt involved. And since I only own 1 sweatshirt there is a 100% chance that it is a “Montana Grizzlies” sweatshirt. And when I’m dressed like that my only accessories are my glasses, a blanket, and a remote control. Because when we have reached the point of “Liz Lemoning” I’m down for comfy times, and comfy times involve me eating cheesy snacks and being wrapped in a blanket as Vanellope Von Schweetz says in “Wreck-it Ralph”, “I wrap myself up like a little old homeless lady”.

Now I am sharing this story because The weekend of my birthday I went out with my BFF Christine. And I was fancy. I had decked my own halls, I was like a Christmas Tree prepared for a lighting ceremony. (It was my birthday, after all.) And then… then, I got back to her apartment and shed all my fanciness to reveal my plain old self. Now don’t get me wrong even plain Lauren is still sparkly… because I sparkle from the inside… I just well…

———————- 2 minute time break————————–

And the rest of the time I look like Mary Ann from Gilligan’s Island. And to those who think my styles are weird, I’m comfortable with every style I have, because it’s all in fun. True story.

♥Lauren

A Fangsgiving Miracle

| Viciously Sweet

I am still trying to hold on to Halloween. Mostly because I’m not a big Thanksgiving fan.

I mean I love having a day dedicated to being thankful. I get to see my family… but I really cannot stand cornucopias.

And I am always afraid their little coned shaped wicker horn is going to show up and provide my day of thankfulness with a serious visual blight.

So I suggest a new jazzy holiday. One that combines the sheer magic of Halloween and the thankfulness of Thanksgiving:

And see you still get all the best parts of the holidays… spooky scary things and food! The best part is that the cornucopia must check itself at the door.

And you can party safely without the fear of that horn of plenty getting in your way.

♥Lauren

Isabel Stare-a-thon 2012: Opening Ceremonies

| Viciously Sweet

It’s that time of year again to dust of your periscopes and get into the groove of staring at Californian sweetheart Isabel! Now as you can remember the Isabel Stare-A-thon is the official start to the holiday season. And it is where we take time to show Isabel how much we care to stare at her face.

Now this stare-a-thon has an exciting new development. Isabel has since the last stare-a-thon got engaged… to Dave the man who wants to make every day his own personal stare-a-thon.

And now to announce the theme of this year’s stare-a-thon I must give credit of this brain child to my new giggling accomplice/coworker Jonathon who is excited about his first Stare-a-thon:

So everyone… get ready to get some Isabel Staring Happening!

♥Lauren

Club 27

| Viciously Sweet

Seriously. My birthday is finally here.

That means the whole calender year is nearly complete. But for me it’s a beginning. A new chapter.

And since my 26th year was one of the strangest, and most surreal 365 days of my existence and tentatively titled “The Passion of Unicorn” … I’m expecting my next 365 to be even more exciting.

I’ve been sharing my experiences on this blog all year so this post is going to be like one of those clip shows from the Golden Girls… except it will have awesome new material too. Because that is what I do.

So let’s kick it off with the old.

Things I’ve Learned in my 26th year:

♥ Crepes are fantastic. And in the right moment, they can be life changing.

♥ That every one deserves to feel like their life is a romantic comedy, even if it only lasts for a few hours.

♥ That everyone should “be prepared to be surprised”, because if you keep your eyes open… you can see that life is made of them.

♥ That sometimes you should just try to realize in the future things won’t suck in the way they do now… but it isn’t going to be perfect.

♥ That the things you want, aren’t always what you need or get… but I will never settle for anything that is less than wonderful.

♥Some people in the world really just like you for who you are. And I send them my most sincere thank you’s.

♥There is no shame in telling people to “Wang Chung tonight” especially if you are sincere about these wishes.

♥Sometimes a churro makes everything better.

♥My optomistrist is right, I should have a tv show. Everyone would have died of anticipation during my sweeps month.

♥Even though loved ones have great intentions… no one but you, knows what is best for you.

♥ Talk to strangers. Because sometimes awesome things happen. This is a shout-out to all my lovely blog readers who I have never met in real life but feel an affinity for!

♥And if there was a narrator to my life, it would be Drew Barrymore.

Things I will do in the next year:

♥Buy more red lipstick. I’m so tired of people trying to drag it down. I like it and it likes me. And I don’t care what dudes say about it.

♥Enjoy my girliness with reckless abandon. I’m 27 and I bought sparkly diamond mascara. #dealwithit

♥Finish up my new doodle store! Preview notice, it’s going to be called the “Viciously Sweet Shop” and it may be candy themed. Take that, Katy Perry.

♥Kick back and draw. Work is stressful enough, turning it into silly doodles ALWAYS makes it better

♥ Blast through my ARE’s. Boy have I been procrastinating on those. I need to get my booty back in gear and get it done with.

♥ Maybe the masters… I should probably add that to the list too. I mean if it’s out there… maybe I’ll do it.

♥ Take more dance classes. I stopped doing them because I thought they were “uncool” during my teen years. Well teen Lauren was wrong… I love them, they are the best way to get out energy. And also the weirder the better. I like telling people that I Tahitian dance, and I love dancing around my office. And I think more dancing could help my confidence when I go out to places. Any suggestions of what kind?

♥ Learn how to play the songs I love on Ukulele. I will then pull out said ukulele from my trunk and surprise serenade people.

Have a wonderful Lauren Birthday weekend!

♥Lauren

At least there will be cake

| Viciously Sweet

Tomorrow is my birthday and I did not make the deadline in my Blergsday miracle.

I have to show up and work… like a grown up. Instead of staying home and chillaxing in my jammy jams until I hit the town with Christine.

At least there will be cake!

It is okay. I have been promised cake, and everyone likes promises that are made with frosting.

Make me sweet sweet promises

So it’s all really good news if you think about it!

♥Lauren

Happy Hour

| Viciously Sweet

So I’m not the biggest drinker. But I am a fan of happy hour. And not just because that is when drinks are most affordable, but because of the name. Happy Hour. I think more hours should be dedicated to  happy, and not just because I like to have a drink or two… but because we need an hour where the world is not driving us mad and an hour to pretend like we have never heard of cell phones or the internet. You know, time to just be.

Also if I had a happy hour it would have alcohol and desserts. Because I don’t know if there are two things that could make people happier.

 

True story: I’m not the biggest drinker. And  I never quite know what to drink… and well I know alcohol is not the tastiest thing… so I’m not that picky. And a lot of the time when I order drinks I sound like this:

I’m going to get my happy hour on now.

♥Lauren

Every Pot has it’s Lid

| Viciously Sweet

So many people who know me know I like funny things… and that includes funny people.

My love of 2012, Amy Poehler has inspired me in so many ways this year, and although she herself has had a trying year. She just keeps making things better for everyone.

She has these really great videos for girls, and she sincerely gives stellar advice. But good advice is really just good advice, so have a watch right here:

In this video, after I dried my tears on the closest carpet samples. I realized Amy shared a really beautiful saying in the video.

“Every Pot has a lid.”

every. single. pot.

Now I know this saying is probably old fashioned and directed from grandmothers to girls they deemed spinsters at 21. But as a girl who usually feels like a unicorn trying to board Noah’s Ark, I totally get it. And someday when looking through the mounds of mismatched lids, I will find one that works. I think everybody will. So needless to say, I found this saying really wonderful. It’s sweet and I think it makes a really cute doodle:

And remember one more thing that I have learned from Amy that is so, so important:

“No one looks stupid when they’re having fun.”

– Amy “the love of my 2012” Poehler

Go out in the world and be wonderful.

♥Lauren