I am not always permitted to put doodles of my coworkers online… except for the incredibly tall and full of life Amber…
But this one seems especially pertinent to post.
This is an introduction to “Thon”
If I had to write a biography on him these are precisely the things I would say:
-He is a brave and creative curator of this years Isabel stare-a-thon.
-He handles the large colony of spiders that live at my desk, and sometimes takes them outside so they can live in a place where I don’t have to experience them landing on my bare knees.
-He keeps an incredible amount of paper tubes at his desk. I think he’s going to make a raft out of them, so he can live the dream of forging a river Oregon Trail style (and by that I mean super unsuccessfully.)
-He has and uses a magic 8 ball for all of life’s important questions, or at least what he should eat for lunch. (which is an important question)
-And he is the riskiest person on your team at trivia Tuesdays… he will always go for double or nothing, even though the result is almost always the nothing.
-and one other thing that is much easier illustrated:
It’s true it’s all flippy and the sort.
And like most other dudes with Jim Halpert hair he has no quarrels about this…
When contacted Jim Halpert only had this reaction to his folicle buddy:
Image courtesy of “Jim Halpert faces” Tumblr
And seriously, they both make that face…
I think this is the best and briefest introduction I have ever accomplished.
(Authors Note: Amber just told me his hair is now longer than the standard Jim… but the doodle still stands.)
Happy Tuesday!
For some reason I felt super great today.
Like birds practically dressed me this morning.
I even went to work and was like pretty okay with the whole thing. Which is very rare since I have lately had the enthusiasm a quite uninterested ball of yarn.
I have not idea why I’m feeling so great on a Tuesday when I have a scratchy throat. I think it has something do with all the Keanu Reeves that has been placed in my life lately… or maybe because I get to go to my dance class tonight…
Anyways Today’s doodle is an anchor… maybe because of my mermaid dreams… or maybe because I really want to go to the beach.
I always feel bad for it during the fall and winter months… no one is really there. Everyone in California acts like we live in the arctic and it’s uninhabitable until next May. I actually prefer to go to the beach in the winter… there is no one ever there and I can just reflect on the vastness of it all… And I think the ocean just wants some attention. I plan on slipping on a sweater and heading out there some day after work:
Think about the ocean today… I swear it’s thought about you.
That’s not creepy… if it is listen to this song. It makes everything better:
I want to be in Paris… but well the most I can afford right now is a crepe and a beret.
Okay, Paris is always a good idea. Especially if you are a character in a romantic movie with Humphey Bogart… or Harrison Ford. (In today’s world I think you should be able to pick which Sabrina you want to be or for the boys which Linus Larabee you want to be.)
Don’t judge me… but I’d pick this version. I mean… yeah. The clothes alone in that movie would make my life ridiculously fancier.
Anyways, l kind of wish I was there. I mean not with Humprey Bogart in a movie… but in Paris. You know what I mean, internet.
I felt like I got to go on a vacation today because I got to go measure a place outside of my office… which is always thrilling. With Thon who I have never gotten to have a work time field trip with. And we got to have an adventure because we took the wrong freeway and got mildly to moderately lost. The only downside of our field trip was that it was a fabulous adventure in measuring the showers in a locker room… the truly un-glamorous moments of working in the architectural field. Not only did I end up with frizzy hair due to inner bathroom moisture… but I saw quite a bit of naked elderly ladies. More than my daily quota (which for those inquiring minds is 0 naked old ladies.)
And I felt a little more than awkward being around them with a clipboard, a marker, a measuring tape. Some inquired what I was doing… others just gave me strange looks. I didn’t mind answering questions… because I would want to know if I was in their position.
What can you really do?
After all I had a job to do. And I could have given a singing crustacean about their nudity.
Somehow though, being around that many naked people who didn’t give a damn about it felt very European in nature… But the fact that I ate Mexican fast food for lunch shortly thereafter reminded me that I was in fact not in any portion of Europe. Also the fact that I was so far into the desert today I thought I drove to the end of the world… and then a tumbleweed dramatically strolled past my car on my return to civilization. And my contacts were filled with dusty cruds.
Oh California, with your large gaps in civilization, and questioning nude geriatric women… How silly you are.
i feel like some Gwen Stefani right now without spectacular abs…
My life has been like super crazy hectic lately.
I don’t know when it happened… But my boring drawing-in-my-pajamas-lifestyle is disappearing.
And it’s being replaced by the life of someone who to keep dates straight… has a calendar.
A CALENDAR for crying out loud!
I now have to know when dates of the week are… and well that has never been one of my strong points. And then I have to remind myself to not doodle over days on said calendar.
And for a first time calendar user. I can tell you I’m not super into it. It’s severely cramping my lifestyle. I’ve always relied on being an “artist” and just wafting all about… like one day I’m here next day I’m some place else. Following my proverbial sun to wherever I need to go….
Will I call you back? Will you see me before the seasons change? The world may never know.
And now there are schedules, and deadlines. And for some reason… I just seem to keep failing at all of them.
Meet you here at this time? I’m either super early, or nope… I forgot this and now we have to reschedule…
And now I’m stressed out. And the only way I can de-stress is to make light of my last week of failures.
and now without fail….
Lauren’s week of Blunders:
– Losing my pants… where did they go? I have no idea. But the weather is changing and I don’t want to wear tights under my dresses everyday. This is not practical. I’m about to put out a flyer looking for them.
– Forgetting how calendars work… why are we arguing about days of the week??? Because I was looking in the wrong month. Yeah, I am not used to calendars.
– Falling to the earth for no apparent reason while standing and talking to my mother. She probably thinks I was drunk. Every time I do something strange she assumes both alcohol & drugs.
– The always dangerous, the dress you are wearing is see through… And now everyone has seen your superman underpants. Why do dresses not seem sheer when you are trying them on? Why do superman underpants show through everything?
-Everything I have done at work… I mean EVERYTHING! Any time I try to do things the right way… and I end up crying… and my boss has not been super nice to me lately either. I have contemplated becoming a gypsy and a hot dog attendant at weinerschnitzel several times in the last week. Or a combination of the two “Gypsyschnitzel” has a great appeal to it. I imagine a lot of tambourines and sauerkraut.
– I also can’t find my sneakers and think there is conspiracy happening… where did one pants and one shoe go to? I’m thinking Jack White stole them…. and I can’t explain why.
-And everything pertaining to relationships (part of my need for a calendar) Apparently people get upset when you tell them… you have no time for them.
I’m done with my blunders… Okay this all seems kinda negative.
So onto some positive things
– I have been doodling more lately… which is better than all the nothing I was drawing last month.
-New TV is on and by that I mean… “The Mindy Project” & “Parks & Recreation”. I seem to watch nothing else.
-My internet adds are all for new shoes and yeti merchandise.
-I’m getting pizza in a few minutes and I feel like this:
It’s Tuesday. My project is late, and of course the printer isn’t working.
There is are only 2 things I can do
1. Play Musical Printers and Try to get this drawing printed for my boss in the next 20 minutes.
2. Join the Circus
The silliest answer is the one I would most happily choose. Then people could discuss it when I don’t show up tomorrow. I can just imagine it….
Shocked Coworker #1: “Where is Lauren?”
Shocked Coworker #2: “She isn’t in? Did you wait longer for her to show up… she’s always late.”
Observant Coworker: “She left all her drawings, and the metal scale next to a strawberry stained note saying she’s left for the circus”
A hush spreads over the room.
Shocked Coworker #1: “She left food in the fridge. It’s mine.”
And then much like the conclusion to the tv series LOST, I will never be discussed again in the valleys of San Gabriel.
I will leave behind a hummingbird feeder, and assorted doodles of cats. I will take everything else… For my chic new gypsy wagon.
I would miss my big girl bed, and of course wi-fi. But I can always loiter at some circus adjacent starbucks after I master my new circus-y skill.
What would that skill be??? Well, I don’t really know. I don’t think I would trust me as a tightrope walker, or a juggler of swords. I could probably sit on an elephant like a champion. I am good at waving and climbing… so Elephant sitter on-er it is!
Let’s go with that thought… Lauren the Elephant Sitter. I would sell literally dozens of tickets.
Maybe I should stay with Architecture a little while longer.
Circus dreams
Happy Tuesday everyone. I hope your printers are working with gusto.
I mean really honestly I can say that when certain peeps aren’t around… even work feels like a vacation. Which is great because I haven’t taken a vacation day since my family came into town in May. And I needed a stress free day or two.
I had to stop myself from bursting out into “La Isla Bonita” right now. I am just that thrilled. I feel like a penguin on Holiday… which is the best segue I could think to get to this little dude:
I feel like a summer penguin.
And also I know the trouble that I got into the last time I started photoshopping a coworker… but maybe this time it will end up differently. And with that I present to you my newest coworker, Thon in a Mara-thon:
This is my new favorite thing to photoshop. And in his hand is obviously a bud vase… never a solitary glass..
I’m like living the life of a doodle-less spinster… and I’m not into it.
So I have been trying to get into writing again. And I can’t even think about what I want to share… Does anyone want to know about me spilling all my ice cream all over me and my coworkers car like a small child? How about falling so quickly out of like with someone that my head feels like its spinning round like a record? Or that when I was threatening one of my coworkers during lunch I started laughing so hard I snorted in front of 3 of the jerkiest people on this planet?
But that is no excuse. I love making posts, that is why I’ve been doing it so long. It just seems like so many other things are pre-occupying my time…
Like British television shows, trying to figure out why my hair refuses to look like I combed it, and the mystery of what ants are doing in the restroom at work…
And then there is all the things I would rather be doing. For example, in Sunny So-Cal there is this thing called Comic-Con happening. And I as you know am a fantastic nerd, and this place has Bruce Timm, Marvel, DC, Sherlock, Community and basically so many comic’s and artist’s I could die on cloud nine while strolling through it’s aisles. Fun Fact: I am notoriously good at strolling. Also, a bonus to that is I can stroll ever so happily because I have a horrid sense of smell and do not mind the smell of comic collectors, who are not always big fans of hygiene.
But I am not there right now.
I am at work.
I mean, I know I’m getting paid. But I’m thinking of the thrill of dressing up like a super hero for no reason, and eating pizza near the ocean, while collecting so many buttons about obscure comics and British television that I could coat my bed spread in them seems so alluring. I am allured by nerdiness.
So I made this doodle today on my computer while waiting for my prints to come. (I am not sorry for that printing pun.)
I’m just going to sit back, smile… and day dream about being dressed like Wonder Woman.
Have a super great weekend everybody. Dress like a superhero if you need to… I think I will tomorrow.
♥Lauren
P to the S: If you went to Comic-Con tell me about it… so I can live vicariously through you :)
So in the Jolly United States. It is the days where we celebrate not being a weird large satellite of England. And yesterday the Fourth of it all, every inch of green space from coast to coast was filled with joy, barbecue, friends and marginally illegal fireworks.
I am saying this from experience. I lived the fourth of July dream that Thomas Jefferson was all about. I drank, I saw fireworks, I chatted, I wore a sweater, and saw people running through alley’s with launchers and scads of fireworks that are safer in less arid areas of the US.
Since a Holiday this year was on a Thursday there was many a possibility for a 4 day weekend. In fact, 93% of the population is still traipsing around in luscious weather, eating expensive sandwiches and drinking before happy hour. I am not a part of that majority. I am the people who had to go to work. Getting here this morning was legitimately one of the hardest things I have experienced in the last week. And I did bootcamp bellydance snake arms for 40 minutes. But once I got here I convinced myself it’s not too bad because I didn’t have to use my vacation time, and I am technically making money on a day where no clients would call at all…
But still being at work when you would rather be someplace else leads to things like this:
All of these things are so good to be doing.
And I am inclined to think that nearly anyone would rather watch TV in a fort of legos while eating waffles is better than making PDFs for hours straight.
Happy 5th of July to everyone in every part of the world.
The title of this post seems a little sexier than my posts probably are. So how am I going to combine “subliminal messages” with clothing and my blinding optimism together? Well brace yourself this blog is about to get *snaps fingers together* thrilling.
Well, let’s just say I discovered based on the way I dress to work, I can control the conversations had in the office. It’s happened a few times in a few outfits, and I think its hilarious. My clothing has caused long discussions of the Wedding Singer, Wonder Woman, 80s teen movies, and 13 going on 30. Basically my wheelhouse of interests since I usually try to avoid talking to my coworkers about anything resembling my personal life (sorry Amber, this is why I enjoy my corner seat… I only talk to you!)
Anyways a few weeks ago I went shopping and got found this dress. It made me feel like singing about how pretty I feel. Basically I was like channeling Maria from “West Side Story.” When I left the dressing room this other store customer told me sassily “That dress is all you.” I was thrilled. I bought it and I felt pity on any girl that wasn’t in that dress (not really, that’s a little harsh.)
So I finally got the time in the morning to wear my dress and make myself look like a human. I got to work and by 9:30 Johnny was snapping his fingers and talking about the gangs in “West Side Story.” Only an hour and a half in and I was a success. We discussed Bernardo and his purple suits… and then we pondered why any gangs would pick orange and purple as their colors. I mean those are like soda colors. Like Kool-Aid flavors. And really nonthreatening, btw. I mean imagine being accosted by a man in a purple well fitted suit. What can he really do to you… give you a makeover? Not let you go to the dance?
I feel pretty witty and bright too!
And just in case you want to put on a red dress and sing this song… you don’t even have to go far:
Viciously Sweet 