2012

Words I might have Ate…

| Viciously Sweet

I may be actually making everything worse for myself by admitting this… but I have to.

I did something this week that I’m not entirely proud of. I said the thing I wanted to say… but knew it was one of those, you-shouldn’t-have-said-it kind of things. But there it was. It sprung from out of my mouth, and it was so matter of fact and harsh I knew it the moment my breath left me.

Anyways of course after I said it, I felt awful. But I simply could not apologize for it, because I simply cannot form those words to that person.

I can say for a moment when I saw the words pierce their intended victim I felt like I had slayed a dragon. I mean this person brings out the worst in me. They are constantly provoking and prodding me so I can be my worst. I usually try not to let them get to me, I smile and I turn my cheek, but this time it was different… I was bubbling with anger… And when the words escaped, it seemed magical to be the person with the cruel “Wuthering Heights” like upper hand. It just isn’t very me to do so…

And although I felt glorious for those 45 seconds… I just didn’t like it. And I feel really awful that I went to that level. Reflecting on this situation I realize it probably only bothered me, because I don’t think this particular cares one iota about me, or my feelings. There I go again. Maybe that is an unfair observation… but it is my opinion.

I heard a song when I was feeling bad about this situation that made me realize that I should let that person be the pot and the kettle all by themselves. And they can think whatever they want about me, because I try to be a good person, and spread joy and giggles- most of the time.

I just have to remember this when I see them and become filled with rage.

Party Serious this Weekend!
♫Lauren

*And yes, the title is a Green Day reference… I’ve been listening to “Oh Love” all week..

The Cat Olympics

| Viciously Sweet

I think sometimes my cats are trying to get to the Olympics, and as cat owners know there are very few categories cats can participate in. The few tests of endurance made for felines are obviously: sleeping, eating, barfing grass, and pooping.

While Elliott has the silver medal in sleeping on my bed… I’m more concerned about the dreams of my little gray cat Rocket…

Here we are while he’s working on his digestion

Rocket goes to the bathroom with the sheer power of Thor. I’m really concerned how if I feed the pets the same amount of food how he can make so much poo. He is like the Carl Lewis of pooping animals. Sometimes I swear he goes to buffets while I’m at work all day… just to make sure that litter box is full by the time I get home…

So I drew a doodle about it, and because I’m more than a little weird I keyed it into the sweet 1985 musical hit by Eddie Murphy:

He potty’s all the time!

♫Lauren

Provocative Greetings

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I have a world of knowledge I need to talk about, but it seems so heavy for a Monday. And much like a plate of steamy meatloaf with a bowl of soup on a really hot summer day… I’m going to choose to have a barbecue chicken and chilly lemonade kind of post instead.
Today I will share a doodle crossover sensation… which is both doodle Lauren and her favorite cactus… Provocative Cactus.

I just realized that we are quite into summer already and there has been nary a provocative cactus post…And having a summer season without a Provocative Cactus is practically illegal in California.

Without further ado I give you the doodle of the summer:

That cactus really has it going on. And I apologize to the children… because just like real life there is about 80% more boob in this picture than what people can usually handle… there is really just no place to hide it.

Tomorrow I may plague the internet with my burdens… but, then again maybe we should just enjoy some cotton candy.

♫Lauren

Sensible Sweaters: Not Allowed

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There is some weird weather happening around the LA area recently. It’s more like I’m in New Orleans, than 20 miles from the beach.

The air is both drippy, and unpleasantly warm. And last night/ this morning it even rained. Now don’t get me wrong I’m not complaining… in fact:

I’m hoping for more rain this afternoon.

Have a delicious and childish weekend, I know I’m going to.
♫Lauren

Narcostudy

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Sometimes studying is really tiresome. This is especially true when you are studying pages of how to reinforce bricks.

There is actually not much in the world more boring than studying to be an architect. And from talking to my friends who are in the same dilapidated boat of studying, I know I am not alone. Hey there study buddies!

But lately when I am perusing my study guides, I keep being attacked viciously by blankets and the Sand Man.

Today for example I only made it through 17 pages of brick patterns and mortar ratings before my eyes succumbed to the sweet allure of my dreams… which were sadly also about bricks.

Maybe after some good dinner I will be a little more successful.
♫Lauren

Simply Charming

| Viciously Sweet

I am currently fighting the funky fog that rolled into my noggin.

To combat the funk, I have been trying to absorb fun and happiness, like a plant in Norway struggling with photosynthesis in the dark Norwegian winter. Lately, since most things have not been working, I have been listening to some of my favorite songs (on repeat, Sorry Dab)… one of my absolute favorite songs is “Natural Woman” from Aretha Franklin. I used to run around as a child singing every where, much to the chagrin of my Grandmother and parents, and casual strangers. Once there were some old ladies at the market that told my grandmother it was not an appropriate song for a 4 year old to be singing, and she told them I was a child who had “soul”.

For some reason when I hear that song, I feel like I can do anything… and I want to run around in a pink power suit with a beehive as tall as nature will let me, and sing this song in every key except the appropriate one:

Shout out to my homie/ 1960s dream fashion twin- diva category:

Now usually, all my problems can be quickly resolved by ignoring the world and watching girly movies. But as of late, it isn’t working as well as I had hoped. So I switched from just “watching” and decided it’s time to “work” on myself. Basically, if my life were one of those girly movies, right now I would be in the cool montage scene. I’m learning about life, taking great advice from my friends in the areas of their expertise. And I won’t say I haven’t had a few setbacks, but everything is coming up roses for me lately. I have been studying hard, and trying to better my standings in the world and my work place, and being fashionable while doing these things! Hello there, Architectural license tests I’m coming for you! And when I find the right Matt Flamhaff (in the right timeline) I will be well on my way to being 30, flirty and thriving!

I really wanted to find the Clueless-Cher-Soul-Changing montage but, I couldn’t find it… And since I feel very akin to Jenna Rink, she is always a great example for how I feel. Anyways, I would like to thank my friends for being really great, and giving me wonderful advice that I will treasure forever. I will be out of my fog soon, I can just feel it! I just want to say all of my great friends out there, and “Natural Woman” by Aretha Franklin have made me realize:

But, I would be nothing, without all the great people in my life… you give me soul.

♥ Lauren

Midnight Train to Camelot

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My Imagination is still on its trip around the universe. So making doodles has been very hard to do.

I have had to come up with a series that I think I will start tomorrow to power up the good old noggin, and yes it will involve some of the girliest movies under the sun…

Today’s doodle is going into the Lauren’s Big Musical Pun Box… and much like My Hall and Oates joke… it is probably funny to only me and 4 other people… so without ado here’s my totally relevant (if this were the 1970s) Gladys Knight and Pips joke:

pip it up!

Here’s a song to listen to while you stare at my spot on Gladys Knight costume:

And why is there no mash-up on the internet of Gladys Knight as a knight already? I’m disappointed in the other weird people out there.

First I had to make the Significant Otter and now this… come on!
♫Lauren

Are you there imagination?

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I have been a little out of sorts lately. I think it’s because I need to watch cheesy romantic comedies, and eat ice cream (hello, weekend). I need to embrace the things that make me, the giggly Lauren I am. Instead of avoiding them like I have been doing for the last few weeks. I like being silly and this doodle just illustrates the point (that was a pun):

Have a snazzy weekend! I know I’m going to!
♫Lauren

Pump up the Jamz w/ Jen

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Good Afternoon Internet!
I think I have killed the hearts of millions with my Rachel observations. And so I want to spend today sharing some love… internet style.

I have really great readers! And people, I adore them so much I would totally be a character witness for if they ever ended up in the nice clink… one of those people is the fabulous Jen of The Modern Women’s Society.

I found her several moons ago and love her sites combination of photography, food that makes me want to fly to Australia to eat it, and her adorable and nearly identical to my thoughts on pop culture!

Now I have made a few doodles about her which I haven’t posted because they didn’t encompass the straight up gangster that she really is. But this doodle, I think encompasses both her badassness, fabulous fashions, winning personality, and the ability to bust a cap (of homemade jam) on you:

Happy Wednesday or Thursday or whatever day it is already on the other side of the world Jen! Thank you for being fabulous. And anyone who hasn’t… visited her site, it could change your life!
♫Lauren