I would like to think I’m a very fashionable girl. You know, if you are into girls who as my coworkers call me “Dress Like America.” And by that they mean, I wear a lot of nautical clothing.
My Current Fashion Icon: Mary Ann Summers from Gilligan’s Island. Yep, I’m only 45 years behind in fashion/ updates in clothing. But who else out there has 7 straw purses for various straw purse occasions?
But lately someone is crashing my fashion forefront and that is my dear friend Jimmy. He’s becoming the trendiest trendster out there, and no he’s not buying stove pipe hats, and he’s not becoming a Lincoln impersonator.
He’s forsaken izod’s and polo’s and started to dress more like a happening dude of the 1930s… because that is how Jimmy’s are. I think all this is fine and dandy until he sent me a picture of an overly striped jacket with extra stripes on it…
And then he told me it was $800. And when my brain regained consciousness it could only make this doodle:
I told him there are better things to do with $800. Like take a trip to Chicago, go to Santa Barbara for a few days… Buy 3,200 chicken nuggets… Join a gym for 5 years… Buy uncountable erasers… get 1,600 prizes from a $.50 machine… give me $800 dollars…. Because if you don’t have Kardashian loads of money… friends don’t let friends buy $800 sweaters.
There are many things that can be said about me. One of those things is I have a very certain style of clothing I am the most comfortable in. Now it’s not sweat pants outfits, or superhero capes or anything of that sort. I am sort of in a serious relationship with dresses. I actually have so many that I could go about a month with never having to wear a pant at all… and since I live in California… basically I live a dream pant-less existence.
Earlier this week my mother told me showed me a dress that looked a bit like a mid-century-modern-sailor. And since that is basically the style I go for, I told my mom she was pretty spot on. I loved it so much I had decided on purchasing it!
And then I realized the next day that I had a problem. I have 3 versions of that very dress and have no real need for that dress at all! As heart breaking as it is it would be silly to have 4 blue nautical inspired color block dresses*… unless of course I was going on a cruise on the love boat, and then everyday I would want to show up on the deck like the most convivial passenger on a boat (which I would be.)
But since I have to work in an office 30 minutes away from the beach… I must suppress my nautical desires. But, I can still have my dreams…
*I’m pretty much blaming my need for navy blue clothes on my 4 years at Catholic High School. It just goes so well with everything, and makes me feel spiffy. However Nuns, I still refuse to wear white socks…
I have been really busy, with being the maid of honor to my sister and her quickly approaching wedding. Seriously, its like 10 days to that thing and I’m running around like a bull in the streets of Pamplona…But, that doesn’t mean I should neglect you. I think today I’m going to tell you a story that could make any girl relate.
You know when you are just trying to have a good time, and you put a little extra effort into looking nice, and you feel like a million bucks (that’s a lot of deer’s, btw.) And then you realize you are in the presence of an avid drinker of Haterade, their favorite flavor in this case, “Rain on Lauren’s dreams”. Well not too long ago I found myself in this situation, and I was not as drunk as I wish I could have been to have to be around this person.
I decided that with a little help of the B.F.F. I could completely ignore this person. I mean like totally ignore them, like a CBS comedy. So then as my luck so has it, I found myself not 10 minutes later in a conversation that includes this certain person… Shoot me in the face, right? And then much like the 1993 hit of Tag Team, “whoomp, there it is” an insult out of nowhere.
“OMG. Her hair is a weave.” And that her mentioned… was me!
Just like that, like its just a fact. I was so insulted, that I really had no response. I touched my not fake hair and felt a little bitter pang. Ouch, usually I don’t put a lot of effort into myself. But I put my hair in hot rollers that day. Hot Rollers!!! I was trying to look nice!!! And then I thought if I had RuPaul was actually my fairy god mother, she would have all the words to make me feel better at that moment… all the wisdom I so desperately needed. I think she would have told this person to “Sashay away, and untuck back stage.”
But this time, I really did the right thing, I think. I responded, “My hair is real, thanks.” And I ended it, I dropped the conversation and really felt like a big girl. And left to bigger and better conversations… (So I later OMG’d about it with my friends, and told my sister*, but in the moment… acted I totally acted like an adult.)
But, I’m not so much an adult that I also didn’t take the time to draw about it:
And I realized that this person and I shall never be friends, and that is WAY OKAY with me. I could say something like I learned to be a better person because of this situation. But I really just realized I like myself, and I’m so glad I don’t have to be in Horsetown with that Naysayer all the time! So you know what, I’m going to go on being 5 feet of tangible sunshine over here. And next time I will have a guard Kenneth with me:
I’ve been getting in some trouble for some months now, every time I dress nice… people follow me to my car, stare deeply at me, or accuse me of staring at their man.
Um I just tried to look nice for a change, sorry that me putting more that 10 minutes into my makeup offends people. To try to appease the public (and save myself from swift parking lot murders) I have decided to spice up the old wardrobe:
P.S. This is Christine’s response (which I immortalized in doodle):
Thanks little liquid beanie!
P.P.S. I did stare at him… he was sitting across the table from me. Hey Angel!
At Unique LA I purchased a not-so-unique, but incredibly fun telescope necklace. I wore it today at work closed… until lunch when Eric asked if I was wearing a rape whistle. Although I am a fan of guarding yourself from stranger danger… I do not actually own a rape whistle… so, now the telescope is open…
and I can spot a pirate at 2 times closer range now… So watch out Jack Sparrow.
Jimmy has been saying that people are telling him to change up his polo shirt and vans stylings. They have even suggested places to shop.
Jimmy says he just “can’t imagine wearing those clothes.” Being the awesome friend that I am, I think I should help his imagination out.
The first fashion inspiration was sent by Jimmy himself.
I call it “Inspector Jimmy”
Here is the inspiration:
The second look is a little Bob Dylan-y but I think Jimmy could pull it off… due to the architect inside him.
This 3rd look is for professional Jimmy. I could see him being a little Mad-men-y in the future, when he’s crushing the hopefuls architectural dreams:
The mad inspiration:
The fourth look is casual Jimmy. I could actually see this working. Also I like it because it’s kind of sailor-ish
This final look is soft scarfy Jimmy:
I hope this helped Jimmy!
Also what look do you like best for Jimmy?
Okay I am one of those girls who doesn’t really like coats with hoods, or umbrellas when it rains. Really I’d rather just get wet hair…. But I have this incredible desire to not catch a cold every 2 weeks. Luckily I live in Southern California…. and it doesn’t really rain much here. But the weather has decided it wants to pour sky liquid upon me…
My new option includes wearing super cute hats!
I really love that classy 1920’s cloche hat that is all the rage in magazines as of late:
or like my fav. look of Naomi Watts in King Kong
Unfortunatley this is in style hat is a gateway hat… And I may start wearing my artsy 1940s-1950s hats about too…
This Shirt, as seen on one of my favorite clothing websites:
It looks like a person who couldn’t sew tried to stitch this together the only way they knew how… the wrong way. I find this shirt is not as artistic as the website would like me to perceive it. Especially for $40, this is ridiculous.
Also it reminds me of that episode of the Cosby Show when Denise made Theo a replica of a shirt he wanted and it ended up looking like this: