lauren

Simply Charming

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I am currently fighting the funky fog that rolled into my noggin.

To combat the funk, I have been trying to absorb fun and happiness, like a plant in Norway struggling with photosynthesis in the dark Norwegian winter. Lately, since most things have not been working, I have been listening to some of my favorite songs (on repeat, Sorry Dab)… one of my absolute favorite songs is “Natural Woman” from Aretha Franklin. I used to run around as a child singing every where, much to the chagrin of my Grandmother and parents, and casual strangers. Once there were some old ladies at the market that told my grandmother it was not an appropriate song for a 4 year old to be singing, and she told them I was a child who had “soul”.

For some reason when I hear that song, I feel like I can do anything… and I want to run around in a pink power suit with a beehive as tall as nature will let me, and sing this song in every key except the appropriate one:

Shout out to my homie/ 1960s dream fashion twin- diva category:

Now usually, all my problems can be quickly resolved by ignoring the world and watching girly movies. But as of late, it isn’t working as well as I had hoped. So I switched from just “watching” and decided it’s time to “work” on myself. Basically, if my life were one of those girly movies, right now I would be in the cool montage scene. I’m learning about life, taking great advice from my friends in the areas of their expertise. And I won’t say I haven’t had a few setbacks, but everything is coming up roses for me lately. I have been studying hard, and trying to better my standings in the world and my work place, and being fashionable while doing these things! Hello there, Architectural license tests I’m coming for you! And when I find the right Matt Flamhaff (in the right timeline) I will be well on my way to being 30, flirty and thriving!

I really wanted to find the Clueless-Cher-Soul-Changing montage but, I couldn’t find it… And since I feel very akin to Jenna Rink, she is always a great example for how I feel. Anyways, I would like to thank my friends for being really great, and giving me wonderful advice that I will treasure forever. I will be out of my fog soon, I can just feel it! I just want to say all of my great friends out there, and “Natural Woman” by Aretha Franklin have made me realize:

But, I would be nothing, without all the great people in my life… you give me soul.

♥ Lauren

Midnight Train to Camelot

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My Imagination is still on its trip around the universe. So making doodles has been very hard to do.

I have had to come up with a series that I think I will start tomorrow to power up the good old noggin, and yes it will involve some of the girliest movies under the sun…

Today’s doodle is going into the Lauren’s Big Musical Pun Box… and much like My Hall and Oates joke… it is probably funny to only me and 4 other people… so without ado here’s my totally relevant (if this were the 1970s) Gladys Knight and Pips joke:

pip it up!

Here’s a song to listen to while you stare at my spot on Gladys Knight costume:

And why is there no mash-up on the internet of Gladys Knight as a knight already? I’m disappointed in the other weird people out there.

First I had to make the Significant Otter and now this… come on!
♫Lauren

The one where Lauren turned out to be a Rachel

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Dear Internet,
I’m sorry there have been a lot of things happening as of late. Not all of the things happening have been particularly interesting. One thing that has been interesting has been the stalking. I have an internet stalker… who I am sure is reading this right now! Hi. Can you do me a solid and please stop freaking me out? The other interesting thing that happened to me was I got a free pretzel at the mall.

Also, I have been not watching an extensive amount of romantic comedies… like my normal self would- mostly because I am studying my for my architectural exams, and I have been obsessively exercising. I got to change it up, and I suppose that time is now.

Something else I have been doing different is watching “Friends”. Although I loved the show when I was a child and teenager. I always thought that Ross and Rachel turned out to be the most irritating people ever. Like, ever. Did they like each other? Did they have like a fluffy hair championship going on? Were they really supposed to be together? Why did Ross marry everyone he ever met? Bleh. Everyone got tired of it, because in real life everyone just wants to eat a sandwich with Joey, and sing a song or two with Phoebe.

Now when I was a kid I idolized Monica, she had it all the cool apartment, a really fun job, she dated TOM SELLECK! And eventually she married Chandler (Boy, was that a Spoiler if you haven’t seen that show)… who was the coolest dude on the show to me. I knew as a child I wanted to grow up to be a Monica… you know help people out, and clean everything one more time after other people had already cleaned. And then I started watching the show again and I realized the most terrifying thing that could happen to a girl.

I was just innocently watching when I realized I grew up to be a really naive, moderately spoiled, gets my clothes dry cleaned, completely lost kind of 20 something person. And I can’t cook, nor do I have those long peasant skirts, and I don’t relish sandwiches as much as Joey… and all I do is freak out about not knowing what I am doing… I saw Rachel differently, I understood her turmoil about liking and hating Ross at the same time. I understood why she runs away from commitments, I understood how much time she spends on her hair, I understood that she has no idea why she does these things… because I have no clue either.

And I even say stuff like this:

I’m going to hide in a corner and flip my hair out 90s style now. And Ross is going to go marry some British girl I think.

♫Lauren

And this is a shoutout to Amber… Dab is totally a Joey.

The Nostradamus Award

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The following doodle came from one of those gray moments in life. And sadly not a Dorian Gray kind of moment. And… not exactly a 50 Shades of Gray moment in life (shout out to Amber who read those books twice). But yet a moment that could have been narrated well by Gilbert Gottfried.

I pray that someday he will narrate my life story…

Any who, on with the non specifics. Where as most will have to wait for my life story* to get the full details on this particular event in my life, we can all share this doodle. Basically, I never realized how important things you learn in high school are. Exponential Mathematics, running laps, learning how to do a Southern accent to be in “Steel Magnolias” never have done me any good in my real life. I never realized how having to read the Scarlet Letter outloud in school 9 years ago saved my life:

So, I sit here and wonder if and when I will employ any of those terrifying facts I learned from “Wuthering Heights”…

And note to all the people out there: The only time I’ll be “Scarlet” is when I’m playing “Clue.” She gets to go first, and in the Office Edition it’s Pam… and I am totally a Pam.
♫Lauren

*The tentative title is “Love and Lollipops and Daggers: the Truest tales of Lauren”

The Legend of El Tejon

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Jolly Hollers Internet!
I have fallen off the scan-your-doodle wagon. I have a bunch of doodles I really just need to get on their way. I think this one is one of the most culturally important doodles because it shows a turning point in history.

Me, the worst Spanish speaker in recent history, besides my sister. Actually knew something in Spanish my coworker the Dab had no idea about it. (And Dab is the Spanish Master.)

So mark it in the records 6-4-12, was the day I knew more Spanish than… the Dab.

I will celebrate it every year. With joy and fervor. I will commemorate it with one pristine churro. I however do acknowledge that this doesn’t compare with me thinking ghost in Spanish was “El boo Hoo Hoo”.

Let’s go get a churro! Yeah Yeah YEAH!
♫Lauren

The Snail Mail of Joy!

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A few moons ago I made a fun and funky fresh doodle of Jen from one of the best blogs ever Sips of Jen and Tonic, because she had inspired a new dream for me. Apparently when Jen saw her doodle it filled her days with joy and raptors:

The doodle actually changed her life in a “Amelie” like way. And through a series of events dispensing her own variety of justice, and dancing through the lush forests of Oregon with a gnome she lovingly calls Giuseppe. Jen decided to spread her new found doodle related joy by sending a little bit of her Tonic splendor down to this very Lauren, in the South of California.

So this little letter filled with ultimate happiness slid all the way down El Camino Real, and and landed at the right foot of my mailman. So excited that he wasn’t just delivering magazines and petsmart coupons, my mailman was on a divine quest to send a rare actual piece of mail. After standing tall with the letter in his hand he exclaimed to the sky, “Lauren needs this immediately” and waited until I got home to hand me this little friend:

And I was so excited, because that envelope was full of presents… and Lauren’s ♥ Presents!:

I felt like a child on the morning of Christmas, except this was an UNEXPECTED CHRISTMAS! So I decided to (jon) hamm it up with my new prize:

And to following my childish joy I decided to make like a teen show starring Ben Savage, and Introduce “Jen to the World”. So I showed her off to the fake Chicago in my room:

And then I tried to introduce her to my Norton the cat, but… He was very busy doing cat things:

You know how cats are. So I send you a doodle thanks for totally making my day:

And yes friendship to me means matching sailor outfits…

♥ & lollipops,
LAUREN

Work Diary: May 24th

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Today has been a busy day at work. Really really busy. It’s a day that will go down in history as “pretty darn busy.” It was also the kind of day that separates professionals from the… not professionals.

And let me be the first to tell you… I’m on the professional side.

Everything now makes so much more sense. The files seem much fuller, the text more encrypted than even before. Pixels more squarer than they have ever been… The codes for LA County crisp, as a magnificent apple in my mind.

If I were like a zany professional teen, I would write this down in my hello kitty diary quicker than anything ever before, but I’m too sophisticated for that… I have the power of doodles:

And everyone take note that it was a CC:’d email, not a BCC:’d email so it was no secret!

♥ & breifcases,
Lauren

I regret nothing!

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Right now I’m sitting in my cubicle. I kind of have to go to the bathroom. I was just kind of thinking about my recent greatest hits and decided to share some of my silliness with the good people of the internet:

-Yesterday, I sat on the floor with Nancy talking about shapes (for a design competition). It made me feel like a small child, and a grown up all at once. Inverted Rhombuses for life!

-I saw, encountered and very recently blocked a man’s phone number who looked precariously like Zach Efron. He was in fact so handsome I didn’t trust him when I met him… but, then I learned a little more about him and trust him even less. And yes people I discussed this with, he is as shallow as I imagined his pretty face to be.

-I went to a birthday party for one of my friends parents (who I have only known for about a year and a half) and in a room full of his friends and family, I won the trivia contest about his life.

-I got asked for my phone number while in a hospital gown…

-I didn’t eat a pizookie… which for international readers is a very large cookie that is made in a pizza tin. But I wanted to and plan on doing so very soon.

-I got in an argument with a Rooster. I decided to write a song about him in the Key of “Rock Lobster” from the B-52’s, it will be called “Rude Rooster.” As you can glean, he was not a gentleman.

-Some stranger on the internet called me “hot face” which only makes me think that I may have a fever or something.

– I got a free tote bag for buying a frozen drink, and I felt like a winner. I also have already used that tote bag at the beach, aka the only place tote bags want to be.

-I met a bird whose name was “Bird Lancaster,” I laughed with reckless abandon. And I wondered if he was the “Birdman from Alcatraz”… which is a Burt Lancaster joke ;)

And I have come to this conclusion:

Here’s to another odd and fabulous week!

♥ and lollipops,
Lauren

That’s What Friends Are For…

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Much like a Dionne Warwick jam, it is really great to spend time with your friends. Especially if your friend is Rupert Evert singing “I say a Little Prayer For You”. Oops wrong song reference… and on the note of Rupert Evert, I sent him a friendship bracelet in 1998 and he’s never gotten back to me. He must be so excitedly wearing it that he forgot to send a thank you.

As always I digressed.

But this weekend a conversation happened between me and Christine that just shows you the magic of friendship. And if it were crafted into a 2 hour movie… it would win all the awards.

I present to you today’s doodle:

I imagine the movie based on this doodle starring Kate Winslet and Penelope Cruz, in the roles they were born to play.

However I would like to point out today is Amber’s birthday and she will have a smashing doodle on this page tomorrow. Happy Birthday Am-bear.
I am just too busy with all this work silliness to make a proper doodle today… but oh tomorrow there will be doodles!!!!
♫Lauren